Sunday, July 1, 2007

Pin The Tail On the Disorder

I may blog about my OCD, but I don't go running through the streets yelling, "Look at me! I have OCD!"

I try to keep as much of my "specialness" to myself as I can and I only let those very close to me know...on a need-to-know basis.

I was quite disheartened when I received some paperwork to complete after winning my dream job at my son's preschool for this coming school year. This particular paperwork came from the state health department and required a methodical recounting of all medications that I take and the reason that they are being taken. I do take generic Prozac to help manage my OCD and I stated this on the form...but reluctantly so. I am afraid of the fallout that might occur once the Christian preschool receives my completed form. Will they be knowledgeable about my condition or will they see me as a threat?

This business is rekindling memories of my application for a security clearance with the Department of Energy a year before my son was born. The clearance was required for a project I was doing with my corporation. The application required 10-years of regurgitation of names, dates, addresses, jobs, and therapy. Once it was discovered that I saw a therapist for something other than marital reasons, an army of interviewers and psychologists were dispatched to go over my case and determine if I was fit to work with secure materials.

The nonsense was a huge hassle for me as well as an emotional drain. I'm sure that thousands of dollars and over a year were spent determining that I wasn't a threat. All-in-all it became a humiliating experience when I was forced to talk to people (human resources and character witnesses) in my company to explain why a band of people were investigating me. Most of my peers received their clearance in only a few weeks, while it took me well over a year.

Ironically, I never did any work on the project.


isabella mori said...

i don't understand - how can they have the right to ask such a question?

OCD On A Stick said...

That is a very good question Isabella. I'm not sure how they can ask such a question except that I will be working with children. The right to confidentiality is trumped by the need to protect children.

I doubt that I will fight this invasion of my privacy. I'm not willing to rock the boat on this one. I just hope that the powers that be will not be ignorant about OCD.

Thanks for stopping by!

Donna said...

Happened upon your blog thru Dr. Deb's :)

I would hope that the preschool is open-minded enough to not hold the OCD or your medication use against you. However, I have known people that are so afraid of being outed on their own mental health issues that they come down real hard on those that admit they need assistance. Hopefully they will be understanding and not see you as a possible threat to a child or a teacher (the idea of which is so ridiculous anyway!)

OCD On A Stick said...

Donna, thanks! I had a talk with my "director to-be" and she said that she didn't foresee any problems and seemed empathetic. So, that is great news and relief for me.